My first blog

First off, if this blog sucks it's not my fault....

Like Tony Franklin, I was only given six weeks to make this a championship blog. Clearly it takes at least a year to become a true spread type blogger.

"It hurts, it hurts bad" ...

Now everyone who knows me, knows that I'm a huge college football fan. I've always rooted for Auburn, I've always wore the orange and blue (even when they fired Terry Bowden) and I even stood behind Tubs when they tried to oust him during jetgate. But the events of this season, especially those of the past week, are beginning to to make me think I'm rooting for the wrong team in orange. (Can I get a "Hook'em"?)

I can't imagine Tony Franklin would have ever taken the job if his interview with Tubs had went something like this: "So Tony, we want you to come in here and completely change our offensive philosophy. Even though we've always been a running team, and all we've recruited over the past nine seasons are running backs and blocking tight ends, we want you to make us a high scoring, pass happy machine. Think you can do that? Great! Oh, and uh, by the way...you can't hire any of your own position coaches, or run practices the way you did at Troy. But hey, we'll have a GREAT compensation package for you just in case things don't work out between you and the guys who have been here forever. Just ask Al Borges!"

Memo to Tommy Tuberville: Fire your entire offensive coaching staff at the end of this season and let the new Offensive Coordinator bring in his own guys.

Ok, for the non-sports fans, the remainder of this blog shall be football free


"That's how we roll" ...

So the first headline I see on al.com yesterday morning was this: "Mobile, AL area girls, some cheerleaders, arrested for vandalism"

With my curiosity piqued, how could I not click through to find out more? Imagine my surprise when I read that the girls in questions are current MGM students, and that the offense in question involved the "rolling" of a fellow cheerleaders house. Now, having participated in a few "rollings" myself (New Years Eve 1990 comes to mind), my initial reaction was "You've GOT to be kidding me!?" After all, "rolling" your friends' houses and cars is a time honored tradition, a little harmless fun between classmates, right? However, after reading a little further, it became clear that this was much more than a simple "rolling". Aside from the standard toilet paper in the trees, these vandalous vixens decided to make salt patterns in the grass, effectively killing it. Then they decided to smear honey on both the front door and garage door of the house. (Can you say "Have fun repainting those!") Finally, as if all that wasn't enough, they smeared oreo cookie filling on the family car (hope it didn't ruin the clearcoat) and stuffed the tailpipe with a potato. Wow. At some point in time, you have to think they knew they were crossing the line. I mean, toilet paper can be cleaned up with a little manpower, but doing things that you know are going to cost someone a lot of money to repair...give me a break. Obviously there's more to this story than was reported in the depressed register, but I don't recall any of our "rollings" ever being that destructive.

"You have restored my faith in humanity" ...

Perhaps in an effort to show that the students at MGM aren't all malicious vandals, al.com posted this headline today: "Mary G. Montgomery High School picks Annie Bryant as homecoming queen

I wasn't entirely sure of why this tidbit was deemed newsworthy until I clicked through. Annie Bryant is a student at MGM who has Down's Syndrome. In an unprecedented gesture of kindness, over 2,000 of her fellow classmates were able to put pettiness and social status aside and cast their votes for Annie. Perhaps there is hope for our society yet.

"You want answers?"... "I want the truth!" ... "You can't handle the thruth!" ...

I just came across this posting on WKRG.com: "Childrens Toy Controversy"

"Some folks are claiming to hear more than just baby talk from Fisher Price's "Little Mommy: The real loving baby cuddle and coo". The baby doll is manufactured in China by Mattel and sold at Target stores nationwide. The doll says a series of coos and babbles, but some people claim to hear "Islam is the Light."... We left a message with Mattel, the parent company of Fisher Price and are waiting for their response. According to management for Target at Bel Air Colonial Mall, Mattel does not plan to pull the doll off of store shelves."

You can't make this kind of stuff up. After watching the "video evidence" it's clear the doll is saying something, but is it really saying "Islam is the light"? I mean, couldn't it be saying "I love to fight" or " I know you're right" or given that it's made in China, perhaps it's saying "I'm China's Might!" They(China) do want to rule the world you know. perhaps this is the first part of their invasion plan?



My Shameless Gimmick Item ...

The top three Overrated/Underrated aspects of the world...or at least my world.

1) Overrated: cable news networks Underrated: Devon Walsh returning to WKRG :)
2) Overrated: Mobile's attempted annexation of Semmes Underrated: The fact that Sam Jones will not stop until every Wal-Mart he can see is inside the city limits.
3) Overrated: $4.00 a gallon gas in Birmingham Underrated: $3.00 a gallon gas in Mobile


Finally, I'm sorry this blog sucked, but it wasn’t my fault …

I made too many contributions to "sub-prime" blogs in the past, and now I don't have enough creativity left in me to stay afloat.